If you can name the source of that movie quote... you have my pity.
Usually financial institutions piss me off, but today one is entertaining me instead.
In December of 2009, I was running low on cash (since I hadn't worked for almost a year), so I sold all my stocks so I could continue to pay rent. At the end of the month, I received a dividend payment in my brokerage account in the amount of exactly $0.01, triggered by something that I had owned before I sold it all. I left the penny in the account, figuring it would take more than a penny's worth of time to initiate a funds transfer. Besides, I planned to use the account again after securing a new source of income, and the penny would then roll into my stock purchases.
Today, I've reached a point financially where I'm ready to start investing again, so this morning I logged into my brokerage account. I was surprised to see that my penny was missing -- my balance was a paltry $0.00, not the exhilirating $0.01 I expected. Checking my account history, I found a debit on 7/1 in the amount of $0.01 labeled "RESERVE PENNY BALANCES". I assume that's a euphemism for "we're stealing your penny because we fucking feel like it".
Now, I wasn't too worried about the penny, but just for a laugh, I clicked on Contact Us and sent them a message:
Subject: Where did my penny go?
Body: Really? You took away my penny?
This afternoon I received an email from customer service: "Thank you for contacting ShareBuilder about your $0.01 balance. It is in your account, and available for withdrawal."
I just about died laughing. I made them give me my penny back! :D